IBM Announces Replacement for i5/OS
Posted by AS/400 GeekMar 7
Rochester MN – With the recent announcement of the new IBM Power Systems which will replace the System i hardware, the i5/OS will also be replaced and renamed. Because of the much greater capabilities of the new operating system, IBM has named it the Virtual Universe Operating System – VU/OS.
Running under VU/OS, the individual user appears to have not merely a machine of their own, but an entire universe of their own, in which they can create or remove their own programs, databases, libraries, users, networks, and planetary systems. They need only specify the universe they desire, and the VU/OS system generation program (QGOD) does the rest. This program will reside in the QSYS library. The minimum time for this function is 6 days of activity and 1 day of review. In conjunction with VU/OS, all system programs have been replaced by one program (QPROPHET) which will also reside in the QSYS library. This program has no parameters as it knows what you want to do when it is executed.
Naturally, the user must have attained a certain degree of sophistication in the IT field if an efficient utilization of VU/OS is to be achieved. Frequent calls to non-resident galaxies, for instance, can lead to unexpected delays in the execution of a job. Although IBM, through its wholly owned subsidiary, The United States, is working on a program to upgrade the speed of light and thus reduce the overhead of extraterrestrial and metadimensional paging, users must be careful for the present to stay within the laws of physics. IBM must charge an additional fee for violations above the *NOMAX limit.
VU/OS will run on any IBM Power System equipped with the Extended WARP Feature which is a single-board nuclear reactor that supplies the needed 20 KW of three-phased power for up to 12 years.
Users should be aware that IBM plans to migrate all existing systems and hardware to VU/OS as soon as their engineers effect one output that is (conceptually) error-free. This will give them a base to develop an even more powerful operating system, target date 2010, designated “Virtual Reality”. VR/OS is planned to enable the user to migrate to a Totally Unreal Universe. Although Apple Computer claims its users have existed in a Totally Unreal Universe for years, IBM refutes those claims.
The IBM Virtual Universe Operating System, coupled with the new Power Systems hardware, is designed to help you consolidate and simplify your IT environment and your universe at the same time.
For more information, contact your IBM Virtual Representative.
[...] IBM announces replacement for i5/OS (not for real) : Mid-deranged.com’s fake, satirical story on IBM changing the System i operating system to VU/OS, with the VU standing for Virtual Universe. [...]
Just as funny second time around – but now we stand on the brink of success. One brisk stride forward .. ..
I can’t wait until the VR/OS comes out!
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